Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
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