and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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