Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
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