butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
my mouth tastes like poor choices
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
i drank out of a bidet.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize