i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
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