If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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