I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Randomize