Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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