Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
