I'm lost and stupid without you.
Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
