talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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