i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
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