so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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