and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Randomize
