Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
