is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize