So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Randomize
