im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
