Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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