is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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