And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
