the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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