I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
