thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
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All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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