we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
