We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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