Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
