If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
