Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize