You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
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