It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
COCAINE IS GR8
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Randomize