I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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