would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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