ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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