If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
We won't sleep together?
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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