is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize