he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Randomize
