Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
how drunk are you?
Several
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
