his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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