I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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