I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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