I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
