Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
