hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize
