You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I looked at my own cervix.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize
