Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
