How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Randomize