She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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