I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize