Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Never underestimate the power of titties
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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